Do things for people not because of who they are or what
they do in return, but because of who you are.”
– Harold S. Kushner
Kindness
I read once that kindness is one of those virtues that is often under the radar because it holds a quality of softness. Unlike the stronger virtues such as bravery, perseverance, determination, or courage that has a sense of forward momentum, kindness has no directional energy, and yet once received, it is powerful in its own way.
Kindness holds a disposition of gentleness, of tenderness and of an awareness of another human being. Random acts of kindness are when it’s least expected, and there is no expectation of receiving anything back in return. Kindness can be in words but often it is in action.
When one receives kindness, it triggers a sense of surprise, gratitude, and a desire to repay in some way. The gesture touches the heart and it is never forgotten. Kindness is such a beautiful gift, and its energy stays forever in the heart. Kindness is an expression of the soul from one to another.
When we put out kindness, it is simply because we want to. Whether there is an underlying need to feel good or not, the intention of being kind is an all around win-win for all parties involved.
Kindness is not simply reserved for another person, it is also important for oneself. To be kind to yourself when things appear messed up in your mind, is so important to give yourself permission to make mistakes. No one intends to make a mistake. It is out of unawareness, or lack of tools, or lack of practice that outcomes may not be as anticipated. When we are kind to ourselves, we pick ourselves back up to try again.
Sharing with you my own experience:
My ultimate role models for what kindness means to me are from both my grandmothers. Each left behind for me what kindness looks like, what kindness feels like when received and what impact kindness leaves behind. One of my grandmothers was so kind – she treated everyone the same. No matter what nationality, what personality, what individuality, she was kind to each of them all in the same way. It didn’t matter. She would receive everyone with a kind gentle laugh, kind stroke of the person’s arm, and kind offering of sweets and drinks. She would never say a single negative word about anyone, and always saw people in their best light. She was simply such a warm, kind and caring soul. My grandmother and I did not talk to each other with language as there was a language barrier, but her actions spoke volumes. To her grandchildren, she was always kind and thoughtful, always making sure that we were happy, always patting our hair, or stroking our arm, and saying something about us that was positive based on the twinkle of love in her eyes as she looked at us. She left such a BIG impact on me with her small frame and quiet nature, but influenced me in such a profound way. I notice that kindness is what I sought for in choosing my husband. He is so kind. And kindness has revealed itself in my children’s generation. They are kind in their own unique gentle ways.
Turning it over to you:
Think of a moment when you received an act of kindness from someone. What did that kindness do for you?
In what ways are you kind to another?
If kindness was not so random but typical, what would the world be like?
Kindness means what to you?
Who are your role models for kindness?
Tips and tools to hopefully help you:
- Notice who is struggling, lagging behind, left out and reach out.
- If you were to write out word for word what thoughts you have of yourself, how would it read?
- Treat yourself the way you would a best friend.
- Kindness is felt when received and never forgotten, give someone that gift that lasts forever.